This formally and kindly requests that you please bring me your baby at your earliest convenience. I missed her smiling face while you were on vacation (I guess I missed you too for that matter).
It's not fair at all that she learned to crawl (err, bear crawl I suppose) while on vacation. It's not fair at all that she got to meet (and talk to) the beautiful baby in the mirror. It's not fair at all that she got to swim everyday without Kiki's help! I've missed all of that!Please bring me your baby immediately!
Tata - K!
PS - I'm really not kidding! Seriousy!