Monday, August 3, 2009

An Ode to my Honda...

So, I was sort of thinking that I would join the Fellowship of the Travelling Smarty Pants for their Twitter Ho-down. I've always wanted to join the Ho-down, but these people put me to shame! My piddly 6 or so Tweets a day, just doesn't hang with them!

Besides, it's now Monday. So, here now is my Life is Funny carnival entry, supplemented by a few of my tweets! If you want to join, you can find the rules over at Wendy's blog.
I seriously love my car. It's a very cute 2006 metallic moss Honda CRV (read TOTAL mom-mobile). I've never been one to get too wrapped up into the whole car thing, but she definitely stole my heart.

It all started back in October, 2005. My fiance bought the car and showed up to take us for a ride. While we were all driving around, he showed us all of the features - back seat cup holders (for my 4 year old), 4 wheel drive (for all the ice we get in Kentucky), and surround air bags (to protect his future family). Wasn't that last part sweet of him?

Then, he ended up hurting himself and could no longer fit into the car. You see, he was in a hip to ankle cast and couldn't bend. I have wedding pictures to prove this! The CRV sat up too high (what a pity). He ended up driving around in my 2001 Impala for the next few months until I bought him a new truck. And to be clear, I bought him a truck so I could keep the Honda :)!

All was well. Then this happened!

Someone hit me in our garage at work. This is only my second car accident in 36 years, and I wasn't happy about it! The good news, was that the other guys insurance offered to pay for everything (including the loaner car, while my precious was getting fixed). I love Amica, by the way (and they aren't even my insurance company). I figured since it was on private property, we would each have to pay for our own vehicles, but hey...who am I to argue?

Sadly, I must have done some very bad things in my previous life. Because this was my rental car...

Day 1:

It was useful in the sense that it got me to and from work, but otherwise not feeling the whole "cool" thing. Yeah, um, no!

It's official! I have the ugliest loaner car on record....a cherry red Chevrolet HHR. I'm channeling my inner mob gangster.

Man! This car is seriously ugly! I even tried to make my husband drive it, and he wouldn't go for it. But my 8 year old thinks it's cool (in a Hot Wheels sort of way)!

And for my next trick, I will drive my mob car through the posh streets of Ft Thomas! #beingpunishedforpasttransgressions

For those of you unfamiliar with the Northern Kentucky/Cincinnati area, just think of Ft Thomas as the O.C./Beverly Hills of the area. UGH! This is where my son goes to school and I am the President of the PTO and chairman of the Hullabaloo (the big fundraiser for the year). I do all of this in my spare time ;).

HELP!!!!! I'm in my mob loaner car at the gas station and can't figure our how to get the gas tank open! #beingpunishedforpasttransgressions

So, on my way home, I needed to get gas. At least I thought ahead at my last stop to check what side the gas tank was on. Then I did what every normal person would do.
#1) Sit in your car and try to look cool while you're looking all over for the tank button.
#2) Call your dad
#3) Tweet about it. Cuz you never know who might be following right then!
#4) Google it on your iphone
#5) Call your mom, who then tells you to look it up in the user manual
#6) look it up in the user manual. Thanks mom!

If anyone cares, I’m home. App there isn't anything special to opening the gas tank hatch on mob loaner cars. You just push. Go figure?!?

Day 2:

Taking my mob loaner car to work to get laughed at... #beingpunishedforpasttransgressions

It just somehow did not fit in (so sad). Let's all take a minute to take in the "red-ness" of this car. It's apparently called "Victory Red". I think it should be called "You can see me coming from 5 miles Red".
I'm taking my ugly mob loaner car home for the night! #beingpunishedforpasttransgressions

Day 3:

GOOD NEWS! My Honda is ready to be picked up! BAD NEWS! Enterprise closed at 5:00. AWFUL NEWS! Mob loaner car is going home one more time!

So, when I talked to Enterprise about this unfortunate turn of events. They first told me that since the other guy's insurance was paying for it, I should keep the car as long as I wanted. Once I pointed out that I wasn't too fond of that plan. The nice man on the phone proceeded to laugh non-stop something like "Dude, you even got the red one...yeah, man that sucks". Thanks, Mr. Enterprise, that makes me feel better.

People are staring at me!!! #beingpunishedforpasttransgressions

Day 4:

On my drive in today, another Chev HHR pulled up to my ugly mob loaner car and waved. People really buy these and choose to ride in them?!?

2 Hours and some change until I can take the ugly mob loaner car back where it belongs! #nearlyfinishedbeingpunishedforpasttransgressions

I actually got "Congrats" tweets from @weightwhat and @helenatrandom at this point. I'd like to think because they were so happy for me. But it was probably because they were so ready for me to shutup about the car!

So guess what time it is?! It's time to take the ugly mob loaner car back:)! Woohoo! #nearlyfinishedbeingpunishedforpasttransgressions

Bye bye, ugly mob loaner car!!! Sayonara!! See ya!! Ciao!! I think it misses me already!

Hello, love of my life. How I've missed you! I love your pretty new bumper sans-bugs! You (and red swedish fish) complete me!

That's all for now!

Love, K


  1. I'm sure your car missed you great big bunches. Of course, now mob car misses you. Maybe you can go back and visit once in a while...

    And you really should do the Twitter Ho-down on Fridays. Don't worry about it not being epic length like ours. You have a life. And besides, readers will probably thank you for not making their eyes bleed from excessive reading.

  2. You know, it looks like the other cars in that lot are embarrassed to be parked next to the Al Capone car. So sad.

  3. Lianne - you made my day! I sensed the same thing!